Beware, good citizens of Virginia - the House of Delegates is trying to get into your pants.
The Virginia House has passed a bill that would make it a $50 fine to wear pants that show your underwear in public. No word yet on how this affects swimsuits, which essentially are underwear. Or the Jefferson Senior Streak. Or if leaving your fly open counts. Either way, should the Senate follow suit, cops will now have an excuse to stare at your booty.
I hear the next bill under consideration is a proposal to change the state motto from "Sic Semper Tyrannis" to "Sic Semper Underwear."
And a word from my father: "Thank goodness, these guardians of the right and holy are able to ignore phony issues like transportation, vehicle taxation, revenue problems and the like and attack the truly important problems."
Here's the Post's Marc Fisher on the issue.
Sweet, sweet Virginia, always keeps an open door...
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3 comments:
My apologies to those of you who didn't get the Eddie from Ohio references there.
Ah, but our moral watchdogs in the VA legislature have not stopped with the underpants bill (which, at this moment - 6:15 pm, Feb 10, 2005 - has been dropped by the legislature; seems someone thought it might be embarrasing the the Old Dominion). The legislature is pushing forward for State Constitutional amendments that would ban same-sex marriages and would allow prayer in school. Oh, do keep us pure and holy, dear legislators.
Alte Wood
What I think is funny about this bill is how ridiculously ineffective it would have been if they had actually enacted it (I'm pretty sure it was in fact dropped). Remember back in middle school? You know, back when wearing your pants down around your knees was cool (as opposed to now, when it is well beyond passe)? Yeah, they had rules against it then in my school. And boy, those rules helped. I never saw anyone's boxer shorts as they waddled through the hall.
Seems to me like the legislature is just trying to protect people from the lameness of their selves. For me, when I move back to Virginia it just means I'll have to stop wearing underwear altogether.
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