Thursday, April 06, 2006

Miniature Opinions

Here's some cute little opinions you can take home with you and place on your mantle. Batteries not included. Some assembly required. (Actually, I think it'd be funny if a columnist with nothing better to write created a "some assembly required" column - a bunch of random words followed by a few commas, periods, semicolons, etc.)

Tom DeLay: Any Washingtonians remember the time when former NC Senator and D.C. torturer Lauch Faircloth lost to John Edwards, and Marion Barry gave a speech in which he said "Goodbye, Faircloth" jubilantly, like, eighty times? That's kinda how I feel right now. Except without the high-on-crack thing.

Campaign Finance: Post reports that new campaign finance laws restricting 527s have passed. Both parties are talking out of both sides of their mouths here. Democrats are usually for finance reforms, but not in this case where it hits them hardest. Republicans usually want to liberalize campaign financing, but any opportunity to screw over Democrats, right? Personally, I think campaign finance reform is going to be useless without some sort of public financing to defray the usefulness of big contributors to winning elections - Woodhead's Fourth ("build a better wall...") definitely applies here.

Moussaoui: I agree with Ben and Richard Cohen: don't kill the guy. That's what he wants.

Jesus: Seriously, who funds this kind of research? Can I get a grant to devise a chemical reaction to turn water into wine? How about to make water come out of a rock by smacking it with a stick? Or maybe I could combine the two and make wine come out of a rock...

Though this is kinda cool.

France: Launching massive protest over labor law tweaking that would barely make noise here is a rite of passage for French people. Grab a glass of Bordeaux and enjoy the show.


Mike said...

You give a shoutout to Ben and Richard Cohen, but not to me? I'm hurt (granted my opinion was only expressed in the comments on Ben's blog, but still, I referred to Moussaoui as "the Zack Attack" therein, which just highlights how funny and awesome I am and how my opinion is the only one that matters).

My mom and I drank a toast last night to DeLay's departure. Just thought you might appreciate that.

And finally, I demand you write an S.A.R. blog entry at some point. It would be extremely interesting. (Though I think Joyce wrote an S.A.R. novel and called it "Finnegan's Wake".)

Jeff said...

W.T.F. is S.A.R.?

Matthew B. Novak said...

Um, I'm just guessing it's "Some Assembly Required". But I could be wrong... He might be asking for a silly and random entry...

Mike said...

Sorry, "S.A.R." is "Some Assembly Required". We used it a lot in my family.