Give These People Hugs

Aww, poor little Richypoo Cohen needs a hug:

There is almost nothing the Obama administration does regarding terrorism that makes me feel safer. Whether it is guaranteeing captured terrorists that they will not be waterboarded, reciting terrorists their rights, or the legally meandering and confusing rule that some terrorists will be tried in military tribunals and some in civilian courts, what is missing is a firm recognition that what comes first is not the message sent to America's critics but the message sent to Americans themselves. When, oh when, will this administration wake up?

While we're at it, let's give little Susie Collins a hug too. She looks very, very frightened. Maybe she wants a cookie and some ice cream.

And while we're giving hugs, let's not leave out sweet little Mitchie McConnell:

“This is really dangerous nonsense,” McConnell said of the Obama administration’s policies regarding treatment of alleged terrorists. “We have a way to do it, John,” McConnell told CNN’s John King. “Interrogate them. Detain them and try them in military commissions offshore at Guantanamo from which no one has ever escaped.”

Aww, the poor dears! They're so scared of a relatively minor threat that they're whining about the Constitution applying to everyone! Let's give them all cookies and milk and maybe they'll calm down. There, there, little boys and girls, it's gonna be okay.

Goddamn, I wish my country's leaders would quit acting like they have the emotional maturity of a toddler. The Constitution is what it is. You can't make it optional just because you're a little scared. Grow up, people.

Update: Little Susiepoo is so so so scared that we're not going to get good intelligence out of Captain Underpants since he's in the criminal justice system. There there, little Susiepoo, have a cupcake and some reassurance from the WaPo that we're gathering useful intel. Sleep well!