Monday, December 19, 2005

Hoo-ah!

This is my 200th post. You can all applaud now.

Well, that was a good old-fashioned butt-whoopin'. Break out the brooms, 'Boys - you got swept. And thanks to some help from our friends in Pittsburgh and Chicago, we're now in the lead for the last wild-card spot. Wow.

Also, a stupid congressional resolution expressing support for Christmas - like it needs any - inspired some pretty awesome responses. I like this poem from John Dingell (D-MI), who I think is one of the original members of the House of Representatives:

"Twas the week before Christmas and all through the House,
no bills were passed 'bout which Fox News could grouse.
Tax cuts for the wealthy were passed with great cheer,
so vacations in St. Barts soon should be near.
Katrina kids were all nestled snug in motel beds,
while visions of school and home danced in their heads.
In Iraq, our soldiers need supplies and a plan,
and nuclear weapons are being built in Iran.
Gas prices shot up, consumer confidence fell.
Americans feared we were in a fast track to ... well.
Wait, we need a distraction, something divisive and wily,
a fabrication straight from the mouth of O'Reilly.
We will pretend Christmas is under attack,
hold a vote to save it, then pat ourselves on the back.
Silent Night, First Noel, Away in the Manger,
Wake up Congress, they're in no danger.
This time of year, we see Christmas everywhere we go,
From churches to homes to schools and, yes, even Costco.
What we have is an attempt to divide and destroy
when this is the season to unite us with joy.
At Christmastime, we're taught to unite.
We don't need a made-up reason to fight.
So on O'Reilly, on Hannity, on Coulter and those right-wing blogs.
You should sit back and relax, have a few egg nogs.
'Tis the holiday season; enjoy it a pinch.
With all our real problems, do we really need another Grinch?
So to my friends and my colleagues, I say with delight,
a Merry Christmas to all, and to Bill O'Reilly, happy holidays.
Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas."

What Meter? - The Poetry of John Dingell will be released in March.

1 comment:

Mike said...

Congrats on the milestone. You're way ahead of little 110-post me.

And of course, cuck the Fowboys. Cuck them for eternity.

Oh, and Merry Christmas! (And by Christmas, of course, I mean entirely secular gift-giving holiday that, in spite of its strong pagan origins, has found acceptance in the Christian community by pretending the birth of Christ was December 25 when actually historians have pinpointed it around September - but that's really just splitting hairs, I suppose. Besides, the Christmas season is really just a time to spread cheer, not bicker over whether or not the majority religion is being subverted by an extremely minute minority. Anyway, I'm done now. Except to also say Happy Chanukah. :-D)